Are you willing to do the hitting?

Skinny jeans on, a lil cleve (cleavage for short) showing, face on 10, eyes popping, pumps standing tall, stride right, smile on.  I walked into a room full of dark, sexy, black confident men. SCORE!  For me there is nothing like a black man with swag.  You know when he knows he looks good.  Walks like high heaven is between his thighs, licks his lips like Ladys Love, and confidence is girthed in his groin. Ultimate swag! (more details on swag in another post) WHEW!!! *fans self* Back to topic... The question is do I wait for them to approach me or do I approach them?  Am I willing to do the hitting on instead of being hit on?  As I stand there, in the midst of all this chocolately testoserone goodness, do I wait for them to come to me to start conversation? Am I willing to get out of my comfort zone and "hit" on them? Will I be viewed as aggressive? Or will I be seen as confident, bold, assertive? Or even does it really matter who approaches who? Are women ready to face rejection from men instead of being the rejectors?



Of course, like my male counterparts, I don't drop a line or two, I just smile, say "Hello", "How are you", or strike up a conversation about something interesting about them.  I.E. the weather, sports, or if we really don't have anything else to discuss I will bring up work and what they do for a living (sometimes you can get the ultimate *side eye* for this, so be very weary of this topic).  KISS Keep it simple stupid when approaching men.  Especially since men are simple creatures. (hehe) So, I surfed some of my favorite blogs on this topic and polled some of my favorite males for their perspectives.

Here are some of the responses:
Male 1
"I wouldn't mind a girl coming up to me, but it can go either way in my opinion"
"It wouldn't be a turn off unless she just walked up and was like wassup give me your number then I would be like WTH, to me it would just be a girl that I met...wouldn't be looked on as aggressive or confident"
Male 2
"I think most women are just used to the approach being the man's role. I don't think that has to be the case. Just coming up and saying 'hello' is really effective. It breaks from tradition and shows right away that the girl is not old-fashioned. A woman shouldn't be afraid of approaching a guy, because a man might not see her at first."
Male 3
"I would prefer if a woman approached me. If she gets touchy feely, that would make me uncomfortable, but if she's just speaking and there's nothing forward about it, I would like it.
"In my mind, girls are used to getting hit on and propositioned all day. If I hit on a girl, how am I distinguishing myself from any other guy? I know that the odds are that I'm not the first guy during the day to approach her.
"My advice for a girl that's interested in speaking to a guy is to just speak to him because if he's a good guy and he has the same psychology that I have, he might not step to her. He would be a lot more impressed if she took the initiative and did it. Girls don't have to do much. Just start talking about something."
Male 4
"I think, based on my experiences, the woman approaching me worked out better than me approaching her. It gives you a sense that they have a high level of confidence.

"I think the best way to approach a guy is to do it in his territory. If a woman is comfortable enough to approach a guy anywhere, especially in a situation where the guy is in his element--that just exudes confidence for me.
Male 5
"this, the “aggressive nonchalance” is what typically eventually happens when women approach men, which is why i’ve always maintained that women should never do it."

"now, admittedly, most guys would probably say that i’m nuts for saying this, that they wish more women approached instead of just standing patiently in the weeds with their thumbs up their finely coiffed asses, that theres no bigger ego boost than getting propositioned by an attractive and sober woman, and i understand that sentiment, because i feel the exact same way, lol."

So, how do you feel about approaching men? Its 2010 and I don't mind going up to a man with Idris Elba swag, Morris Chesnut lips, Common's ball head, Dwight Howards back and shoulders, Terrell Owens aggressiveness, and Reggie Bush's abs. LOL (I know this man doesn't exist), but if he did I would be definitely hitting on him..OKAY! (*smacks lips, rolls eyes, finger snaps in air*) lmbo

Keep the Faith!

Until next time,
~E