Transformation Thursdays: Forever Gone

“When someone shows you who they are, believe them the first time” Oprah by way of Maya Angelou

TDH and I have been slowly fading to black. When we first started talking things were peaches and cream. He rubbed my back I rubbed his. Then he scratched the kitty kat and the ish hit the fan. Hard. Literally. Gone. He began telling me stories of his crazy college escapades and how he was a changed man. Right, I take everything people say with a grain of salt, but for TDH I knew he was giving it to me straight no chaser. TDH begin going into stories of how popular we was in college because he was Nigerian, in XX fraternity, drove XX flashy car, and engineer. How he could pull multiple chicks in one night and do both of them at the same time and have them do each other. EWW Orgy! Yes, he continued to tell me how he used to sleep with his frat brothers girls (apparently the LBs (line brothers) girls were off limits) and then get busy with his sister sorority and all of the LSs (line sisters). He used to f*ck them all and not care. Red Flag. How about STDs/HIV/AIDs? Hello! He swears up and down he used protection because he isn’t stupid. But, then TDH goes to tell me that he was an A** hole in so few words, and that what we had was probably not going anywhere. Why do I keep attracting men who are packaged nicely, but are completely emotionally unavailable or don’t know what they want? The old EMF pre EMF Under Construction would have kept trying to “change” this man. Old EMF would have seen him as a challenge to take on to defeat. Besides the fact that TDH is a very busy man who works 65+ hours a week, up until that point he made time to see me. We always did dinner during the week and did our on thing on the weekends. Another Red Flag. When dating I love to give people space, but if you don’t even want to make an effort to see me when you are available and don’t have to work, its time for me to move on. If he is interested he will make an effort, call, text, bbm something. The new EMF took my exit stage left. I refuse to settle. I look at it this way, when ever God sends me my Boaz, my King I will know by his character, not by his possessions, his income, or his looks. I have not been back to his house since that conversation. I have made minimal contact just texting/checking up on him to make sure all is well. Remember we work for the same company in the same area. I don’t want our brief dating to be awkward amongst our colleagues. But, I do remember that quote from Oprah by way of Maya Angelou “When someone shows you who they are, believe them the first time” Thank God I believed TDH was the a** hole he was, and let him go.  Although many people are capable of changing his actions didn't speak differently.  My new 2010 motto “I don’t chase em I replace em” has been proven he is forever gone.

Keep the Faith!

Until next time,

~E