Delivering at a Different Hospital

The hardest decision aside of naming Maxwell was choosing whether or not we will deliver at the same or a different hospital. After all the pain and tragedy of losing BJ and Brielle at the same hospital it’s only natural to want a different experience. I had a different and more positive experience at the same hospital when I was spotting at 14 weeks and when I had a cerclage/cervical stitch inserted at 17 weeks. I walked away still pregnant and with hope that I would bring this baby home. Having the cerclage procedure done made me more open to having Maxwell at the same hospital. However, my doctor left the decision up to me and I am going to deliver at a different hospital. Below are 2 questions I had to ask myself in making this decision.


What are my options?
My options are wide open. My OB/GYN office has the ability to deliver at any hospital in my area. My main concern was having a specialized NCIU unit and a Pediatric specialist or surgeon in the operating room when my caesarean section occurs. My current hospital does not have this, and the hospital downtown does. Since the doctors still don’t have an exact cause of BJ’s death it is important to me that once Maxwell is out of the OB/GYN hands that he receives the best treatment. I am trusting God by Faith that he is healthy and all of this is just precautionary.


What kind of experience do I want?
I want a nurturing, joyful, celebratory experience when I walk into and out of the hospital. I want to experience tears of joy and not tears of pain. I want to see, touch, hold and smell the fruits of my labor. I want to hear him cry and hold him in my arms. I can imagine a huge burden being lifted from me, going 9 months thinking “will my baby live” to him actually living and breathing. I have dreams of this out of body experience when Maxwell is pulled out of me and I don’t want it to be the same as when I lost BJ. I can't wait to hear him cry. I think I could/would have this experience at both hospitals, but the hospital downtown will give me peace of mind that I’m going there knowing I’m bringing Maxwell home with me.


There is so much anxiety, anticipation, love, fear, and pain that I know will come when Maxwell arrives. I’m just praying that my decision to deliver at a different place will be worth it all.


Keep the Faith!


Until next time,

~E